God, grant me the serenity.
“Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.”
Romans 5:3–4
May 9, 2023
We are the sum total of every decision we have made in our lives up until this moment.
I have made some really bad decisions.
I am living with the ramifications of those decisions now.
I have been harshly judged, misunderstood, marginalized, and condemned by many many people, most notably family who are supposed to love and support me. I fully recognize I have no control over that.
How do I live with all of that?
Each day, I strive to improve my circumstances.
Each day, I do what I need to do to stay even mentally. I do all the things I need to do to manage my bipolar mental illness. I take my medications, keep myself engaged writing and studying and writing.
I spend time with loving supportive friends, who encourage me and validate me in every way possible.
I recognize the ways in which I am blessed. I recognize the positive, even miraculous results of my efforts. Most notably: I’m still here. I’m still alive.
