Member-only story
Six years on from the absolute lowest and worst time in my entire life, I’m doing fine. I’m doing great.
December 31, 2023
I compare where I am this year with where I was six years ago this night. I was in Louisville, I was alone, and I had no money. An old boss was paying me a stipend of $1000 to do tech writing; that covered my rent. I was living on $194 in food stamps, my mom was paying my phone bill, and she sent me $300 in cash every month. That’s it. I don’t know how I did it. Well, I didn’t always make it. There was one time in October I went without food for two days, and once in November I went three days.
On December 31, 2017, I was resigned to spending the evening alone, lying in bed, looking up at the night sky through my window. I’d eaten a ham and cheese sandwich for dinner because that’s all I had left to eat. Adrian called around 11 and talked me into meeting him at a bar. I Ubered there, I did have a few dollars left in my Uber account. (I’d given up my car several months previous.)
The bar was packed with so many beautiful beautiful young men, just like Adrian. Beautiful. We sat with another couple, I didn’t have money for drinks, but someone gave me champagne. I forget how that night ended, but I made it through.
