I would strongly caution anyone to avoid involvement with someone in a monogamous contract with their partner. No happiness, no good can come from it. You are always off balance, never a focus, always an afterthought. Unrequited love is baked into the scenario. When two people are single, unrequited love is painful, but not having the regret of being involved in someone's betrayal makes it much easier to weather. You recover, you grow, you are free to love again. You are very blessed never to have fallen into an affair. They are ugly destructive relationships.