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Mom lost her credit card. Again.
October 20, 2020
Today was an especially hard day. I’m going on three days now of the deep pain. It hurts, my whole body hurts. Tears are there, at the surface, every time I stop to recognize the pain. It’s pretty constant. I only forget it for a few seconds at a time. It’s unrelenting.
Mom lost her credit card. Again. She loses it several times a week. Just about every time she goes out alone and uses it somewhere. She just sticks it somewhere in the car, in the center console, in the door pocket, in a purse pocket, in her pants pocket. She loses it all the time. Constantly. Then becomes extremely anxious. Terrified someone is using it. I drop everything to look for it. I look everywhere. Half the time we don’t find it. I have to involve my brother. We aren’t on good terms. He’s her power of attorney. I am not. I have no power. He calls for a replacement. Invariably, we find it the next day.
This time, I went ballistic. Way overboard. I started crying, hard, then went upstairs screaming, “I can’t take it! I can’t take it!” Take what? Mom losing her credit card? Living with mom? Being mom’s caretaker? Just mom?
Then I laid in bed, just feeling the pain, and I called to try to get an appointment with the psychiatrist.
