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August 27, 2023
I’m in seminary. For fuck’s sake. I’m in seminary.
What a wild ride I’m on this time.
Why am I in seminary? That’s the burning question. Why is the sex-positive, sexually active (when appropriate opportunities present), “mature BBW” who is ME going to seminary? And isn’t it interesting I list the sex stuff with the seminary stuff because somehow, I think that’s the dichotomy of my life, and it embarrasses me almost as much as it amazes me? It makes me cringe immediately followed by the wry smile I sport every time I think about how I’m living a life that no one could have anticipated, least of all me.
My life is a series of serendipitous contradictions. But mostly, my life is full of adventures. It amazes me how many of my dreams have become reality. Truly, it does. And I don’t understand how that’s all come to be except for I apparently know how to manifest my dreams. Which is the weirdest thing to realize, since I don’t see myself as powerful and goal directed. But I am.
The first time this happened, when I ended up living a life that I’d dreamed of but didn’t believe I’d attain, was in my 20s. I thought about how nice it would be not to have a permanent job and instead be a temp, going from assignment…
