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Premature I Love You’s -or- Let’s Revisit the 90 Day Rule
July 27, 2023
I say “I love you” to my friends, often. Why? Because I don’t hear it enough. I don’t think most people hear it enough. I crave hearing it. I think most people crave the acknowledgement and affirmation that comes with those words.
When you’re dating, and there’s been no implied or explicit commitment to anything long term, it can be misinterpreted. So, I put off expressing such meaningful sentiments until I have a firm sense of where the relationship is headed. You can know when someone is saying “I love you” because they honor and value you and you’re building out a friendship as opposed to when they’re in love with you. It takes a while, but you gain that sense with time and experience. Once you’ve figured it out, it’s easier not to misinterpret.
But there’s a trick to this, and I’ve been tricked many times. (“Tricked” is not the right word. “Fooled”? Not the right word either… I’ll have a think on it.) Not only have men told me they love me prematurely, but I’ve done just the same. In my experience, when romantic love is declared too soon, it can be incredibly dangerous. (This happened with David. He started it, though!)
Sexual chemistry feels like love. It really does. Unless you’re old enough to know better — unless you’ve had enough sex to…
